How to Find the Perfect Surrogate Mother: Key Considerations and Resources

One of the biggest tasks you will need to undertake when setting out on a surrogacy journey is finding the perfect surrogate mother. This can be a life-changing decision, both emotionally and financially. Surrogacy is an incredible option available for couples or individuals who are unable to carry a child on their own. However, the process can be pretty complex. 

Understanding how to find a surrogate mother and learning how to navigate the world of affordable surrogate mothers requires some careful planning, research, and access to the right resources. 

What Is Surrogacy and Why Should You Consider It?

Surrogacy involves a woman, known as the surrogate, who carries and delivers a child on behalf of another person or couple. There are two main kinds of surrogacy:

  • Traditional Surrogacy: This is when the surrogate mother uses her own egg. This makes her biologically related to the child.
  • Gestational Surrogacy: This is when an embryo is created via IVF also known as in vitro fertilization and is then implanted into the surrogate. In these cases, the surrogate has no genetic connection to the child. 

Gestational surrogacy is the more common and preferred option for many because it allows the intended parents to have a genetic connection to their child. This makes it a top choice for those seeking out a surrogate mother.

Key Considerations When Looking for a Surrogate Mother

When you are on the hunt for the perfect surrogate, there are several things you want to keep in mind to ensure the process goes as smoothly and as successfully as possible. 

The Legal Framework

Surrogacy laws vary from country to country. So, before you begin your search for a surrogate mother, you need to understand the legalities. Consult with a surrogacy attorney who can help you understand the legal requirements and contracts needed to protect the rights of everyone involved. You also want to ensure that the surrogate’s home country has favorable surrogacy laws that align with your expectations.

Health and Medical History

A surrogate’s health plays a big role in the success of the pregnancy. When looking for a surrogate mother, consider her medical background:

  • A thorough health screening is necessary to ensure that the surrogate is physically capable of carrying a pregnancy to term without complications.
  • The surrogate should have had at least one healthy pregnancy and delivery of her own.
  • She should also undergo psychological screening to assess her emotional readiness for surrogacy.

Compatibility and Communication

The relationship between the intended parents and the surrogate is unique and requires open lines of communication on both sides. Establishing a good rapport with one another and building a solid level of trust with the surrogate is essential for a positive experience.

  • Find a surrogate mother who shares similar values and expectations about the surrogacy process. For example, you should discuss topics like how much involvement the intended parents will have during the pregnancy.
  • Regular communication helps strengthen the bond and ensures everyone is on the same page throughout the journey.

Agency vs Independent Surrogacy

Intended parents can choose to go through a surrogacy agency, or they can pursue independent surrogacy. Both options have their advantages and drawbacks, as you can see below. 

  • Surrogacy Agency: A reputable agency offers a more structured and guided process. Agencies handle everything from matching you with a surrogate to legal and medical arrangements. This option can be more expensive, but it provides peace of mind and reduces risk.
  • Independent Surrogacy: This approach involves finding a surrogate without the help of an agency. While it’s a more affordable option, it requires more time and effort from the intended parents to handle legal, medical, and financial matters.

Finding Affordable Surrogate Mothers

One of the biggest concerns for intended parents is the cost of surrogacy. While surrogacy certainly can prove to be expensive, there are ways to find affordable surrogate mothers without compromising on the overall quality of care involved.

Domestic vs International Surrogacy

Surrogacy in the US can range in price between $80,000 and $150,000. While this may seem high, many surrogacy agencies offer payment plans, grants, or financing options to help manage some of the costs involved.

Some intended parents choose surrogacy in countries like Ukraine, Georgia, or India, where the costs are much lower. However, international surrogacy comes with its own set of challenges, including travel, visas, and differing legal protections for intended parents. 

Resources for Finding a Surrogate Mother

A surrogacy agency is often the easiest and most efficient way to find surrogate mother options. Agencies carefully vet surrogates to ensure they meet all necessary health, legal, and emotional requirements. Joining surrogacy support groups can be beneficial, whether online or in person. 

Many parents who have gone through the surrogacy journey share advice and resources to help guide others. These groups can provide emotional support and practical advice for finding affordable surrogate mothers.

Conclusion

Finding the perfect surrogate mother involves a combination of emotional, legal, and financial planning. By considering the legal framework, surrogate health, compatibility, and cost-effective options, you can ensure a smooth surrogacy process overall.